Words needed to be spoken is a longing for fellowship - for another person to get me.
Sometimes this longing can be for clarity - for the channel of God to speak clear and direct words into my life, and...again....to see me.
It is a desire to not only be seen though, but to have clarity, to understand and have peace in the divine understanding of life - of me.
There are so many words we need to speak.
And there are so many words utterly excessive that we do muster - and these excessive, words of flight, of hiding and fear, makes the longing even stronger. So we keep speaking. We keep hoping that in between those words lighter than air will suddenly appear words of solidity, of connection and TRUTH.
So we long for it.
Wait for it.
And fear it.
For in truth - what is stopping us from uttering those words ourselves, other than fear?
What is stopping us from creating a cocoon of words where we can rest while our wings extend into beauty?
We long for words even though we don't know it.
We sometimes use our fists instead
We step into that slim new pair of jeans the way we should be trying out our voices; with expectation and certainty. A certainty that these will FIT me - these will make me more me, will feel more and more familiar and safe.
Truth is that words are way-showers; Portals to new reigns and paradigms.
Words are the explicit shaping of desires and dreams
Words in any shape or form are affirmations forging your gray matters of thin, newborn thoughts into solid shape.
And often instead of creating, searching for and extending our own words into the world, we borrow others'. We consume them like candy and get addicted to the superficial high of the importance of another persons life and truth.
We buy them.
Pass them on.
And pretend they matter to you in the same way as your own words would.
Imprisonment with oaths
Like removing clutter from my home, I have started a de-cluttering from words. There are just too many. An excess of meaningless, power-over, demeaning words that are used to teach us they way that is not our own.
Words are always creating.
Sometimes the words from fear and lack substitutes love - substitutes commitment with the creating of oaths. Towards ourselves - but most of all others. We are borrowing their words, their commitments and oaths, and use them as tiny nails boxing ourselves in and others out. Forging relationships built on power rather than will. Morphing simplicity and freedom into rigid ownerships and properties.
We change the words and find new ones, but the core of fear is the same.
A contract pledged in prettier words are still binding. Confining.
If words are escaping you - so is your voice.
If you are copying the expressions of people around you - of people that you feel have more power than you, own it. Notice the value you give to those not being you. Notice how you give your authority away for others to build your life. To speak words of how you feel and what you want.
Start speaking those sacred words
Sacred words doesn't mean that they are pretty or eloquent.
Sacred simply means authentic.
Sacred means that these words are yours only, and that they are direct utterings of your soul.
Sacred means that your soul is visible, shining and raw.
Sacred are those words that are lodged within you, burning to be set free and heard.
And you know what? If you don't speak them, they will burn you from the inside. They will look for other ways to get free, and push, claw and fret their way out instead.
So listen to your longing. And get help if you need it.
But do speak them soon.